Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Darting apostrophes

Darting apostrophes

Sometimes we try to stir up a feeling we wish we had, and at other times we try to block or waken a feeling we wish we did not have, psyche ourselves up, trick our mind into believing something that might not be true! Avoid staring hard enough so that we may not make out the words or the meanings. Hiding what we feel, faking what we don’t. Like believing in someone who turns out to be a liar, but we just refuse the idea that such a person is lying to us, or that someone has steered us wrong, we make up excuses & turn the meanings inside out; Instead of feeling we were the fools on the side.
Sometimes I believe that life follows our lead, it acts the way it's invited to act, like a child, and at other times I believe that we are only along for the ride, we think we are really having a full control over the events in our lives but we are actually not.
The only thing we have to do is connect to our truth, learn our lessons and apply them in our lives. We get to a stage that we may lull ourselves we have grown up enough, but what we turn out to be doing is that we only deal with losses that come from doing what we know to be right and not necessarily to be what we want.

Growth and death are facts in this life; as long as we are going to die, we have to grow in this life, not only a mental growth, but a growth on all the aspects of being, and as we grow, we have to move on, we can't grow and remain the way we are. We have to change.
we usually wait for drama to change our lives, to get our attentions, we don’t try to take the initiative. To take the first step before letting this drama taking control over what we do. leaving crisis & chaos behind.

What makes us who we are? is it our dreams, or the worst things that have happened to us; traumas and calamities ?, what forces us to change, or in other words, from where the majorities of the most powerful changes in our lives come, is it a result of the happiest things or the worst things have ever happened to us?

I don’t know why, but sometimes I find it very stressful going into such maze and I have to put a lot of mental energy into controlling the whole view, that would be OK if I didn’t also have to use mental energy on a million other things.

Saturday, November 25, 2006

Peculiar air of defiance (the little creature started to talk)

Chase of life I'm back, cant say with the biggest details or the least of details, but I have to say more than Too much of events have happened lately; the latest of them is the robbery of our Villa in the north cost we discovered yesterday. I didn’t say all events were pleasant, 80 % are glum.
What just encouraged me to grab myself and start narrating about it, is the one week paid vacation I got from work, they are making a big make over to the place & during this I took a 7 days vacation. I have to say it's the very suitable timing to take this vacation, my manager told me no required work u have to perform, just take this as a rest, that's true I'm in a bad need to rest, many decisions I have to make & I need to order my thoughts to take the right route now. One of them is that I want to leave this job, yea I mentioned it to him, but he just asked me not to rush it. Actually I have been thinking about it long before, but then I just remembered, is it my timing every year to switch jobs?, this is the same exact timing I left my job last year I never regretted that decision at then (maybe cause I always throw past things behind my back and never think about them again or don’t give myself the chance to do). But this one is for totally different reasons.
Yesterday they called, telling me that they will raise my salary, give me exception to have flexible working hours, will take overtime on every hour I stay, the 1 hour will be 1.5, leave whenever I need & it's still up to me, I can try it for another week or month then decide.
Well, what a generous offer to me. But I'm still not satisfied; there is something else I lack, the spirit, the atmosphere, a soul matter in the first place to me, well am I stupid, to think this way? But I can't overlook it every time I come to say yes.
to feel rewarded & not consumed is really important, but I never make myself a salve to anything, even (specially) money, I'm a person who follows its spirit, whatever thing can raise it, is very much welcomed, any place or kind of routine that would put it down, give it many trials, change strategy, wait for a reflection, then if it failed; this routine should be avoided. One can't live miserable coz everyone around or the logic which is developed through others' experiences say so, is not it?
If someone is breathing, transmitting his/her very negative energy in the nearby place, sure later it will be contagion for the others, specially in small environments, I always avoid being stuck with negative attitudes, conversations, or reactions as much as I can, put distance and embark-on alternatives, and backup methods.
I feel I will not be able to function the way I used to before, beside how am I supposed to know that they will meet their promises, it happened many times that they violated it, for reasons beyond their ability but they couldn’t do it, I anticipate and have well understanding and comprehension to the conditions and that what they value for me.
The abode ( now they are changing it ) was not only gloomy but dreary, somber, very stagnant no signs of life, filthy in a way that would make me sick, that forlorn and overclouded place where I daily spent two-thirds of my life. It absorbs the vividness, it puts me in a woebegone & morose mood all day long, I used to refer to it as "The sepulchral tenebrousness of the catacombs". I felt that this atmosphere was very contagion that I now feel myself stagnant, boring to death. Even what I'm writing now ( I will not try to reread it to not cancel it ).

It's a growing company, with three owners too, I expect it to grow, their vision is unique. But I have that gut feeling that my time is up there, why? I just cant withstand any of the situations that used to get on my nerves, just get on my nerves, I absorb it and silence myself, coz I understand it's just a transitory thing & later all this will change.
Because it's still a growing company, our number didn’t exceed 9 members including the 3 owners & me, now they are going to hire another 10, I cant say how much chaos and problems there, and I seem to be their beloved listener, just it happens that anyone invade me to talk, say whatever he/she wants about anyone, i listen, but never comment. Filthy environment. Lies are the hallmark of the most of actions in there, why I remained? Because I expected all this to change, also that one of the owners is somehow a friend to me, before even starting to work in the place.
I dunno why everyone there was working on distorting this friend vision to me, what is their benefit from that? I can't get it. I never believe except in what I see.
My last conversation with him, he said if you remained on your decision to leave us, I would recommend you to work with "a well known company" he used to work in too, if u still didn’t look for another job, well does that seem nice to anyone of you?. My problem is that I'm patient & I value the circumstances. sometimes I feel I'm naive, if I were to talk from the beginning I think things won't be the way it's now. But now all my objections are taken & none says I'm wrong, they obey all what I say (when I mention their sins and policy). Is that because they are obliged to & they are having no other choices?
A 5 months' events I can't brief them in one post, I wish if I can write all about it. But I always forget the details.

Friday, September 29, 2006

Swarms of Memory

Well, as Ramadan was approaching ( now we are spending the holy days of ramadan, five days already gone) my friend M kept insisting that she wants a Fanooos (Ramadan Lantern), any kind of fanoos I have to give it to her, Picture, real one or whatever indication about it, not sure why it's always the Fanoos exactly, maybe coz Fanoos Ramadan is an ancient unique symbol associated with Ramadan, It has passed from generation to generation.
it gives a wonderful atmosphere to the place, u feel a kind of pleasure when u see it, and immediately you think about Ramadan Days, when u were a kid (whether u were doing that or not) before Ramadan Arrival you become excited about having a Fanoos. Playing with your own fanoos that ur parents or any member of ur family brought to u.
Ramadan that month in which The Holy Spirit "Gibril" started to deliver Allah messages to the Prophet Mohamed (pbuh). at Ramadan's night we all sit and wait for " Al Roaya".
The Stories behind (Ramadan Lanterns) back to Al-Fatimi dynasty, many stories mentioned in that place. one of them back to Alhkim Bi-Amr allah … when he wanted to light streets during Ramadan that he ordered all mosques to hang Lanterns ( Fawanees ) illuminated by candles and since then it became a custom associated with Ramadan.
Another story during Al-Fatimi dynasty too, it's said that women were not allowed to leave their houses except in Ramadan. And due to that they were preceded by a young boy carrying a lantern as an indication that a woman is passing by the street to caution men. Later boys used to carry this Fanoos to play with during Ramadan.
Ramdan in Egypt is totally different than any other where, we Egyptians adopted certain mysterious traditions that gave to Ramadan a real special taste & mode, even if some are objectionable & has no intrinsic link to religion, I really like its spirit and the way it's associated with it, Not only, Ramadan Lantern, but also, AL-Misaharaty " The one who wakes people to eat before the dawn prayer (Al-Sohour) ", the canon which used to be fired and heard throughout Cairo from a citadel over the "Al-Mokattam" to announce end of the daily fast, but now it's no more used, the streets full of coloured lights and decoratios, The Konafa & Katayif man, Abd al Motilib Song "Ramadan Gana", Families and friends gathering …. And much more of these traditions which started to go extinct, every year less rituals and less feelings of Ramadan arrivals. Why?

I still remember when I was a kid, the family gatherings at my grand ma house, waiting for Al Maghrib prayer (Sunset Prayer) which always related with the voice of Al-Shiekh " Mohamed Rif'aat " ( till now when I just hear his voice I smell and recall memories of the old classical days)
Things change, I cant see children playing out in the streets, swinging their fawanees & sinning wahawy ya wahawy, instead I can see obvious beggar children everywhere. even Fanoos Ramadan ,,, is that snazzy, lack the spirit, Chinese plastic fanoos that plays music.
We Egyptian tried to cling with our heritage as much as we can. But with days, ages, generations, everything has to fade out, to give the space to other things to emerge!
Happy Ramadan to all …

Thursday, September 14, 2006

Conjecture … The X thing

I don’t know, I'm sure that my impression about that X thing no matter what it is ( a situation, feeling, person, idea …. ) is correct, but why people don’t see what I see?, or they do see but they don’t say!. I notice that X thing since the first day, it steamed my temper in many ways but I tried to not be prejudgment. Later the vision became ways clear. but I'm still silent; maybe waiting for someone, only one to approve my vision, People tend to find meaning where they can, and they believe it. Maybe it's wrong maybe it's right, that's not the point, the point is that people believe it. why you people don’t see what I see?, or it's me who can look more deeply beyond people's minds, so I can feel & touch what they can't reach at. Do I analyze too much into this? Do I?

Saturday, September 09, 2006

Pageantry …. This is to you 'A'

There is no such type of people that would annoy me like those pretentious, bombastic, conceited, lofty, cocky persons. They feign things they don’t have. or maybe they do have but exalt it more than it really deserves. or they keep talking about it in so many different ways till you are fed up and satiate their stories about their gaudy eminence. even if that prominence is real, but that kind of windbag makes it lose its luster and grandeur. I believe that type of peoples if they weren't realizing where they are going to put their feet their grandiloquent ways and rhetorical words will be ephemeral soon, and nothing would last except that scornful put-on.
That much brag blinds their eyes to see facts, to notice people around them, coz they don’t watch or care about anyone except themselves, and how much of imposing words they get. how much a vaunting air of superiority against others they have. They could be grandiose at certain point. but their cavalier attitude may destroy them and lead them into circles & circles of that apish, haughty behavior, be cognizant of that!

Friday, June 23, 2006

Vision in Black and White

Sometimes when I keep on looking, farther and farther still … I wonder; how big would big get? How big will big be … imagining the vastness of empty space …
Intrigued by things that seems so near … yet always out of reach. stuck in my tiny corner of universe, while being aware of all the spaciousness beyond, that can be explored!

Mixed and contradicted feelings …
Why we usually say we will get used for that … why we want to get used for something, adapt to a new condition, situation no matter if that new thing is something pleasant or not, following that similar ordinary old steps to solve that new unordinary thing, want our life back to the way it was before we found out that new change. But nothing ever stays the same. our ability to make patterns is at the heart of our civilization and when certain patterns in our life become ingrained we consequently become resistant to change,
It’s the fear of change that makes us build a barrier between ourselves and that new thing. It’s our choice about hiding, or about going right to what fears us.

Sometimes I feel that I want to sense that change everyday the same way I felt it the first time, I don’t want to get used for it or adapt it … every time i feel it, I want it to surprise me, hit me so deep … that I still can feel the richness of feelings and emotions, but it’s me who usually unconsciously adapt so fast to new situations, specially the unpleasant ones, and the first feeling always fades away.

It comes from our constantly and endlessly seeking to establish new networks to process and store knowledge. to make sense of what we experience, continually searching for new data for new experience and give it the time to make sense of them

it’s true that we learn by making connections to enable meaning and learning to flow.
And our brain is so good at making connections that it will often try to full in the gaps even when it’s missing information, establishing the similar connections with each other over time.

Life is about asking questions, not waiting answers, even if we could not find the answer to our questions, that shouldn’t stop us from keeping to ask questions …

Wednesday, May 31, 2006


Egypt is bigger than this
It’s not a regime …
It cant be symbolized or abbreviated in a person, or era…
For some … it is just …
A mere spot
They are standing on …
Trying to draw their gains from
others tremble …
Trying to amend or overthrow it.

Days will go by
Species will be extinct
And Egypt will remain …
Justice can’t sleep forever
If humans couldn’t save it
Allah will …
Egypt is always precious
And we are the splendid Egyptians

Sunday, May 14, 2006

Reflection of Intermittent Thoughts

Stetting alone and retreating unsociably inside myself, generating words gathered in lines, use my hand to produce dots on my screen … maybe aiming to send a message in code for someone who is in fact somewhere else, someone I know nothing about and might never meet. While my message is traveling for days maybe weeks through time and space … sometimes it’s understood other times not, I don’t know who may read it … it feels like a one-way process missing all kinds of basic communication… there is a potential of failure in putting across what I want to say and how I feel; so if I was writing for people indeed I’d relinquish writing long time ago, but in fact I do write out to myself matching my style, my mood & my needs, although It’s not a typical diary whereas you can’t find a very detailed personal post here, I don’t know, it’s against my nature, but maybe one day I would set and write something very detailed here, till then you shouldn’t expect it, occasionally next Friday 19th of May it will be a whole year of blogging, a complete year!.
along this one year journey I met many bloggers I prefer the term “Next Door Bloggers”, coz I feel it as houses and doors … and behind each door i would find stories and thoughts, i enter it with one knock on my “Go” button or URL linked to my page, at every door step I feel different impression, a certain thought related to that owner of this place, and a special spot I prefer there, a certain post or conversation!.

I’m not sure whether it was a total waste of my time on meaninglessness … spending hours on such page, I’m not sure if it really worth my time … let me say it’s mercurial and let it go at that!.

Wednesday, May 10, 2006


I'm bored of you all ... I'm in state of total blockage

I used not to expect much from people, I always put myself in such status and ask people to do the same, often we go through an entire relationship without realizing that each of us is paying attention to different things, based on different information.
We know ourselves better than anyone else can, we have access to different information about ourselves, others don’t … I know my dreams, hopes, fears and the constraints I’m under, others don’t. but they think that they know everything they need to, telling different stories even when they all have the same information, forgetting that they should be influenced by past experiences, the past gives meaning to the present and it’s only in the context of someone’s past experience that we can understand why what that person is saying or doing makes any kind of sense.
But instead they apply their implicit rules which are developed from their own past experience by which they live their lives; it tells them how they should act & how things are supposed to be.

Knowing all this in my mind, didn’t protect me from the trauma so that I preferred to put myself in a state of disconnection, supposing that this will give me limited visions, fixed, mute and still, but instead I I felt a little off-balance when things became somehow simpler and clearer and I got more self-conscious.
I have to deal with it like hits of some delicious drug & pungent observation of human frailty, allusions play hide and seek capturing the most fleeting memory; then there should be a sense of consolation at its conclusion.

Sunday, May 07, 2006


I just read this Article in Akhbar El-Youm … the subject makes you re-open your eyes to realize more facts around you. Really, everything you see now is planned 25 years ago or more ? Maybe it’s true, but I can see just one thing which cant be planned, it’s our reaction, cause only us who knows what, when and where we should direct it, what we do today is reflected tommorow, and if we didn’t do something for it, nothing will be reflected at then. you shouldn’t blame others for tomorrow; only blame yourself ,,, Because what you expect tommorow should be built by today!
Here I found The Original Linda Heard Article; on which the coming article is based.

هل يعقل أن يكون ذلك كله محض مصادفات..؟!
بقلم مها عبد الفتاح

علاقات الدول مع الدول مصالح. في الأول وفي الآخر سواء 'مع' أو 'ضد' هي مصالح تتقابل حينا وتتعارض في معظم الأحيان وكله وارد. ولكل أن يحمي مصالحه ويحقق أهدافه طالما بغير صدام.من هنا وجد ما يعرف بالسياسة وعلينا أن نأخذ الأمور من هذا المنطلق. نسعي ونحاذر. ندرك ما يراد بنا فنتحاشاه ونفوت الغرض، وما نريده فنعمل له ونناور لنتحصل عليه... عادي!في جولة الكترونية 'تكعبلت' في عنوان يستوقف علي التو. رأي باحثة كاتبة بريطانية تعرف بخبرة تخصص في شئون المنطقة هي ­ ليندا هيرد­ وتتساءل في عنوانها 'اذا ما كانت أمريكا تتولي شن حروب إسرائيل..؟' والرأي مبني علي ما يعتبر اليوم وثيقة وعثرت عليها 'الجمعية العربية لخريجي الجامعات الأمريكية' لولاهم لبقيت في طي الكتمان، اذ ترجموا عن العبرية نصا ورد في نشرة منظمة الصهيونية العالمية 'كيفونيم' في عام 1982، ورقة بعنوان استراتيجية لإسرائيل..' بعثوا بنسخة منه إلي لندا هيرد ونشروا النص كاملا في موقعهم علي الإنترنت '11 صفحة'... عندما تقرأ ما جاء في هذه الدراسة الإسرائيلية أو البحث أو المقال وسمه ما شئت ستذهل لمدي التطابق بين الاستراتيجية المكتوبة عام 1982 و.. لنقل التطبيق العملي الذي يجري لتحقيقها منذ ذلك الحين إلي اليوم ولا أجد تعبيرا أكثر دقة من كلمة تطبيق! بقي للعلم أن شخص من وضع وكتب هذه الورقة وفق ما ذكرته لندا هيرد هو باحث وكاتب وصحفي إسرائيلي كان يعمل في الخارجية الإسرائيلية أو علي صلة وثيقة بها اسمه­ أوديد ينون­ Oded Yinon و... كل ما أطلبه الآن من القاريء أن يمعن فيما تتضمنه هذه الاستراتيجية ومدي تطابقها مع الأحداث التي وقعت وما تزال منذ ذلك الحين.. لعلها مصادفة؟ ولكن مصادفاتها كثر، وأعني بالأحداث ما تنزه عنها الأقدار أي ما وقع منها بقرارات سياسية كمثل الحروب التي أندلعت، والغزوات التي شنت، وما يتبع من هذا وذاك من تداعيات. وأستئذن القاريء من بعد ايجاز المضمون العام لتلك الاستراتيجية، البدء أولا بما يخص منها 'مصر'...
ابتداء يقوم بنيان ذلك المقال­ الوثيقة علي أسس افتراض بأن استمرارية إسرائيل في الوجود يتوقف علي تحقيقها مقومات قوة امبريالية إقليمية مهيمنة تقتصر عليها وحدها، وهو ما يستدعي بداهة ما يضمنه في الورقة وهو أن تضمن 'تفكيك الدول العربية حتي يمكن إعادة 'تخريط' دول أصغر حجما وأقل فعالية وغير مؤهلة للتنافس مع إسرائيل... '!' وهذا الباحث أوديد ينون يصف العالم العربي في ورق الاستراتيجية هذه بأنه عالم أشبه 'ببيت من ورق' أقامه أجانب عن المنطقة، رسموا علي أرض الخريطة دولا بما فيها من أقليات وأعراق... وعندما أبدأ بمضمون ما ورد فيها عن مصر فإن هدفي هو التنبيه عن نموذج من التفكير ان لم نقل عنه منحرف فهو يمثل تعارضا صارخا ومصالحنا القومي والوطنية... ولابد ويكون مفهوما جيدا لدينا هنا كمصريين حيث نجد بيننا فريقا منا أبعد ما يكونون عن فهم النوازع الحقيقية للدولة العبرية بحيث هم يلبون لها ما تتلمظ عليه بدون أن يدروا.. فواضح أن الإسرائيليين أو شريحة منهم أو كاتب هذه الورقة أو كل هؤلاء يئنوا حسرة ومرارة من واقع استعادة مصر لسيناء وفق اتفاقية كامب ديفيد 'لبترولها وغازها وسائر مصادرها الأولية وغير ذلك'.. لذا فهو يسجل أن في 'استعادتهم سيناء أولوية سياسية وقفت في طريقها اتفاقية كامب ديفيد...' ثم يقول بالنص 'سيكون لزاما علينا أن نتصرف بحيث نتمكن من إعادة الأحوال إلي ما كانت عليه قبل زيارة السادات إلي القدس ثم توقيع اتفاقية السلام مع مصر في مارس 1979'.... و'أما إذا حدث تمزيع لمصر مع ظهور دولة مسيحية قبطية في صعيد مصر فسوف يؤدي ذلك إلي إزالة دول أخري في المنطقة من نحوها الحالي' '!!!' ثم يضع تصورا لحسابات أو لنقل تمنيات من حيث تبدر مصر وتفصم من جانبها معاهدة السلام مع إسرائيل مما يدفع عندئذ إلي فرصة العودة بالمدرعات مرة أخري إلي سيناء...'! وان كان هذا ما لم يحدث رغم أحداث مريرة وقعت بعضها ربما يدخل في أبواب الاستفزازات الصريحة التي دفعت أكثر من مرة عناصر وطنية عديدة للمطالبة بفصم عري المعاهدة مع إسرائيل أي وكأنهم يندفعون إلي تلبية ما تتمناه دون أن يدروا 'ولاحظوا أن هذه الورقة­ الوثيقة نشرت عام 1982' ثم لاتنسوا أيضا أن العلاقة المتينة بين مصر وأمريكا برغم الشد والجذب والخلافات من حين لحين الا أنها تعتبر أيضا عامل ردع لمثل هذا الفكر في إسرائيل.. فكر المتحسرين علي سيناء!
نعود إلي ورقة استراتيجية تفتيت المنطقة نجد '... ان في تفتيت سوريا والعراق إلي مناطق تقوم علي أسس عرقية ودينية كما في لبنان هو هدف أساسي...' فالعراق الغني بالبترول يزخر في داخله ما يسهل هذا الهدف..' ثم يقول: 'وتفكيك العراق بالنسبة إلينا هو الأهم من تفكيك سوريا، فالعراق هو الأقوي وهو علي المدي القصير الأخطر علينا من حيث التهديد...' وفي فقرة أخري: 'ان حربا عراقية­ إيرانية تكفل تمزيع العراق بما يؤدي إلي اسقاطه من الداخل... وأي مواجهات أخري عربية­ عربية هي علي المدي القصير عوامل مساعدة وتقلل من مسافة الطريق الموصل إلي أهدافنا... فالأهم هو تجزئة العراق لطوائف كما في سوريا ولبنان...' ثم فقرة أخري: 'تقسيم العراق كما في سوريا إلي ولايات حسب خطوط عرقية ودينية هو وضع ممكن تحقيقه بمثل ما كانت عليه الأحوال في عهد الامبراطورية العثمانية.. ايجاد دول ثلاث أو أكثر حول المدن الأساسية' البصرة.. بغداد.. الموصل.. ومناطق الشيعة في الجنوب تفصل ما بين السنة والأكراد في الشمال'..! ولاتنسي عزيز القاريء أن هذا كله قد ورد عام 1982 في نشرة منظمة الصهيونية العالمية Kivunim: ! ومنذ ذلك الحين وقعت الحرب بين العراق وإيران بلا أسباب ولا دوافع مفهومة حتي الآن واستمرت لثماني سنوات متصلة وانتهت عام 1988 بضحايا ما يقرب من مليون نفس ما بين قتيل وجريح لكنها لم تؤد إلي تفكيك العراق... ولا بعد حرب عاصفة الصحراء التي طردت قوات صدام من الكويت بعد أن غزاها بحماقته إلا أن العراق بقي متماسكا كدولة و... لم يتحقق ذلك إلا مع غزو العراق عام 2003 ثم الاحتلال الذي أعقبه ثم الدستور الذي وضع علي أسس خطوط طائفية يجمعها فيدرالية مطاطة مع حكم ذاتي جزئي للأكراد في الشمال وللشيعة في الجنوب بكل ما يحمله ذلك من عوامل صراع مذهبي­ عرقي يتهدد البلاد بكل توابعه.
سوريا والتحول الأمريكي شبه المفاجيء عنها بنسبة 180 درجة، رغم انه وحتي غزو العراق كان لدمشق علاقات جيدة مع واشنطن.. ثم أن سوريا شاركت في حرب تحرير الكويت مع قوات التحالف بقيادة أمريكا غير تعاون المخابرات السورية في الحرب ضد الإرهاب وتقديمها بمعلومات قيمة إلي واشنطن ولكن فجأة بدأت سلسلة الاتهامات تنهال علي سوريا من كل نوع.. سوريا بدأت نظامها وبنفس أفعالها وبسياساتها فماذا جري؟!.. اغتيل الزعيم اللبناني رفيق الحريري في جريمة اهتز لها العالم واتهمت سوريا باغتياله منذ اليوم الأول ولا تألوا واشنطن جهدا في أضعاف نظام حكم بشار الأسد بكل سبيل حاليا ولو حدث وتحقق اسقاط هذا النظام فيكاد يجمع المراقبون علي أن سوريا ستقع في هذه الحالة ضحية الطائفية المذهبية مثل العراق.. أي يعقب صراع مميت.
لبنان التي ما كادت تبرأ من الحرب الأهلية وتأخذ بنوعية من التوحد الداخلي الا وتتعرض هي الأخري لمرمي الخطر وانقسمت إلي من مع دمشق ومن ضد دمشق.. يبقي الصراع الفلسطيني­ الإسرائيلي وقد عرض له بصراحة مذهلة مزعجة في آن واحد: '... دفع الفلسطينيين عبر نهر الأردن إلي حيث دولتهم الفلسطينية' وما من حل غير فصل الأمتين: العرب 'ولا يقول الفلسطينيين' إلي الأردن... واليهود فيما تبقي من مناطق الضفة الغربية..' وهذا ما لم يتحقق كما كان يراد ربما للتقارب الشديد الذي نما بين الأردن والولايات المتحدة خصوصا مع نهايات حكم الملك حسين والذي واصله بثبات نجله الملك عبدالله الثاني ولعل في هذا يدرأ عن الأردن شر تمنيات بعض الساسة الإسرائيليين فما عاد أحد يطرحهاا الآن علنا في إسرائيل و.. راجع المقدمة مرة أخري لو سمحت.
الأسبوع القادم: التطبيق بحذافيره مع إيران

Sunday, April 30, 2006

Speaking Politics … May I ? Al Baha’ia In Egypt!!

I don’t know from where to start … this issue is new still, but I’m sure the sequences won’t be good on all levels & sides.
Yesterday I have been watching Program
Al-Hakika on Dream II Channel , it was discussing that new judgment sentence which is considering the Baha’ia a religion to be written in the ID & Birthday certificate same as Jewish, Christian & Muslim…

For me I didn’t know much about this new thing except its name, but yesterday I started to realize that it’s something much more beyond just the name, it’s not just a religion as they claim, it’s a new Zionist plan which has just started to carve itself … and I don’t know for where we have to go if it will be true!.

عقيدتهم, معتقداتم ... عن تاريج هذا الفكر
الذي بدأ كمخطط بين الروس و اليهود ... فلسفتهم في الحياة هي الصهيونية ضد الأسلام ... وأسقاط فريضة الجهاد التي هي العدو الألد لأي محتل.
ويدعون أنهم يؤمنون بجميع الديانات السابقة لكن الرسول محمد صلى الله عليه واله و سلم ليس هو خاتم الأنبياء وأن الوحي الألهي مستمر !!!
قبلتهم هي قصر البهجة في عكا واليه يحجون. للمزيد
هنا و هنا والجزء الثاني من البرنامج يذاع يوم السبت الثامنة مساءا و يعاد الأحد الرابعة.

وكان مجمع البحوث الإسلامية بالأزهر، قد أصدر في شهر ديسمبر من عام 2003. فتوى تعلن أن " الإسلام لا يقر أي ديانة أخرى غير ما أمرنا القرآن باحترامه، فلا ينبغي، بل يمتنع أن تكون في مصر ديانة غير الإسلام والمسيحية واليهودية لأن كل ديانة أخرى غير مشروعة ومخالفة للنظام العام". وطلبت الفتوى من السلطات التشريعية والقضائية والتنفيذية اعمال شئونها في هذا الأمر، ووصفت الفتوى المذهب البهائي بأنه وامثاله " من نوعيات الأوبئة الفكرية الفتاكة التي يجب أن تجند الدولة كل إمكاناتها لمكافحته والقضاء عليه".

والان يصدر حكم قضائي بالأعتراف بها, أنا لسة ما أعرفش تفاصيل هذا الحكم. لكنها البداية على ما أظن.
ما معنى هذا الحكم أن يمارسوا طقوسهم في العلن وتحت مسمع و مرأى الجميع في أطار أنه شرعي و أين؟ في بلد اسلامي وهل تستطيع منعهم من أداء ما يسموه بفريضة الحج.
وبما أنهم بيحرموا الجهاد فأكيد مالهمش تجنيد. وممكن ده يفتح مجال للتلاعب. وايه لو ينزل له منهج في المدارس, أكيد مش حيدرس الأسلام أو المسيحية. أو يعفى من حصص التربية الدينية... أسئلة ... أسئلة...
وأخيرا سنه 1960. بقرار جمهوري أغلق جمال عبد الناصر جميع المحافل البهائية لأنها تعتبر قنوات للصهيونيه و قضى بعقوبة من ستة أشهر الى الثلاث سنوات لمن يمارس هذه العقيده و الأن نسمح لها أن تأخذ اطار شرعي ... فاضل ايه تاني ممكن يتقال!
بدأت السنه بالرسوم المسيئة للرسول, كارثة العبارة, وقفة القضاه و ماحدث في أعقابة, تفجيرات ذهب, والان الأعتراف بالبهائييت في
مصر ..... لسه فاضل 7 شهور لأنتهاء هذه السنه الكبيسه, المفروض نتوقع أحداث أكثر من ذلك في طريفها للحدوث ؟

Friday, April 14, 2006

Qs & As …

Tagged By Wonderer
- Grab the book nearest to you, turn on page 18 and find line 4.
but that she loved herself and all her promise and the life to come …

- Stretch your left arm out as far as you can.
I felt dizzy, giddy! … trying to catch something!

- What is the last thing you watched on TV?
I haven’t watched TV since 3 days …

- Without looking, guess what time it is?
2:40 am

- Now look at the clock, what is the actual time?
2:29 am

- With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?
my breathes, maybe the plants around me exhaling carbon dioxide lol… it’s almost quiet here

- When did you last step outside? What were you doing?
today, I went on an aimless short walk hiking for 15 mins & bought something to drink, the weather was encouraging for that.

- Before you started this survey, what did you look at?
Wonderer Blog! & a drawing I just made

- What are you wearing?

- Did you dream last night?
I don’t think so

- When did you last laugh?
With my friend on the phone couple of hours ago

- What is on the walls of the room you are in?
Two small transparent glasses with plants inside hanged & a small Chinese frame in the middle. some other different frames … a mirror with some rose drawings on ,,

- Seen anything weird lately?
Yes, this Quiz

- What do you think of this quiz?
I just said …

- What is the last film you saw?
Wicker Park & Wuthering Heights

- If you became a multimillionaire overnight, what would you buy?
Just give me those millions first …

- Tell me something about you that I dunno.
Well, after I saw the Tag and started to do it, I felt hungry so I went to the kitchen & ate Cornflakes with milk, and here I’m back doing this quiz!!

- If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?
hmmmm … well for me, the world is an irreversible & uncontrollable process! I believe I cannt rewind it to a prev. state. Or expect its coming state, so I have just to change the way I see the world it’s the only way to get the world changed, at least to my own very closed acquaintance

- Do you like to dance?
yes a lot

- George Bush.
Didn’t I say that this Quiz is weird !!, now with this name mentioned in this Quiz I should consider my answers to be accused as “Terrorist Attack” …

- Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her?
Lojayn … it means “Liquid Silver”

- Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him?

Ahmed, Adham … Or a name starts with “L” to match the girl, anyone can suggest ?

- Would you ever consider living abroad?


- What do you want GOD to say to you when you reach the pearly gates?
Pearly gates? … when I’m blessed to talk with Allah, I would like to hear it “we gave you good in this world, and in the hereafter you are of the righteous.”

- 4 people who must also do this meme in their journal.

Alina, Nightlegend, Essam"You was not around from a while, it will be nice to see u doing this quiz”, Eve, Louuu.

Saturday, April 01, 2006

Pride and Prejudice Vs. North and South

North and South
Pride and Prejudice is that Classic novel written by Jane Austen on 1813 and nearly the most popular novel of hers, actually i didn’t read it, but I have watched the TV drama & liked it, afterwards I looked for the novel, there is no big difference between the original book & the serial I guess.
Then I had the opportunity to watch the 2004 TV drama
North and South it’s the TV adaptation of the novel written by Elizabeth Gaskell…Both of the novels were written in the Victorian era … and both of them nearly have the same idea and sequence of events, but with different circumstances. Both are expressing that high state of passion or maybe they looked the same due to the dramatization.
Nearly the same portrayal to the transformation which happens to the characters
Mr:Darcy (Colin Firth) in Pride and Prejudice & JohnThornton (Richard Armitage) in North and South. After The proposal scene and how both of them have been rejected by Elizabith Bennet(Jennifer Ehle) in Pride and Prejudice and Margaret Hale (Daniela Denby-Ashe) in North and South, whilst devastated by this refusal they still regard & care for their beloved silently, I think that is the common thing I liked the most about those two serial drama ... that aura of the gripping spectacle, burning passion, This pride & hard character that resolves in hurt vulnerably under the surface of that stony face and yet still giving these smouldering looks.
The gentleman behavior moral, upstanding, sensitive, respectful, delicate, intense, confident ….. this raw love & powerfully evoked emotions. the struggle & contrast between the two emotions of love, hate then love again at the end.I’m not sure of the transformation from harsh character to more tender side person is because of the shocking opinion they got from their beloved or it was a prejudgment from the heroine character, then later the truth just floated on the surface bringing the real personality of Mr: Darcy & John Thornton.I guess no men are like that nowadays lol.

But talking about the differences …
I believe that Mr: Thornton in North and south was full of motion & passion than Mr:Darcy who reflected in every move the title “Pride & Prejudice” proud and disagreeable, doesn’t perform that least sense of communication with others … Mr: Thornton was more real, he wasn’t in control all the time, his emotions and temper were tangible & unpredictable. According to the feminine part … I see that Margaret Judgments outsourced from her attachment to where she came from, “The South” she rushed her opinions & was really blunt, she was showing a complete ignorant to the place she currently uprooted to. But for Elizabeth at the moment she was reasonable to have these believe against Mr: Darcy.
I cant say I like
Pride and Prejudice more than North & South or the contrarily, but I found that the drama of North and South was deeper and more vital beside it Included some descriptions to the period of the industrial revolution & it reflected some of the social issues & conflicts at that time although I think that there were some inappropriate scenes due to time constraints, like the last scene in the railway station while they were kissing in public … I’m not sure it was that easy to be done in public at that time.

Skipping all the Shortcoming here & there I enjoyed every piece of both classical drama.

Anyone who is interrested to read about these two novels this site “19thnovels”, has a great collecton of free online text for 19th Century English Novels Among them …

Pride and Prejudice
North and South

Quotes from North & South:
Mr Hale: Margaret ! Come in, Meet my Friend and first proper pupil, Mr Thorton. This is my daughter, Margaret.
Mr Thorton: I believe we had already met. I’m afraid Miss Hale and I met under unpleasant circumstances. I dismissed a worker for smoking in the sorting room.
Margaret: you beat a defenseless man who was not your equal.
Mr Thorton: I have a temper. Fire is the greatest danger in my mil. I have to be strict.
Margaret: a gentleman would not use his fits on such a pathetic creature or shout at children.
Mr Thorton: I dare say a gentleman has not had to see 300 corpses laid out on a hillside as I did last may. Many were children. And that was an accidental flame. The whole mill destroyed in 20 mins.

Mr Thorton: I won’t deny it. I’d rather be toiling here, success or failure than leading a dull, prosperous life in the south, with their slow, careless days of ease.
Margaret: you are mistaken. You don’t know anything about the south. It maybe a little less energetic in its pursuit of competitive trade, but there is less suffering than I have seen in your mills. And all for what?
Mr Thorton: we make cotton.
Margaret: which no one wants to wear.
Mr Thorton: I think that I might say that you don’t know the north. We masters are not all the same, whatever your prejudice against Milton men.
Margaret: I’ve seen how you treat your men. You treat them as you wish because they are beneath you.
Mr Thorton: No, I don not.
Margaret: you’ve been blessed with good luck and fortune, but others have not.
Mr Thorton: I do know something of hardship. 16 years ago, my father died .. in very miserable circumstances. I became the head of the family very quickly. I was taken out of school. I think that I might say that my only good luck was to have a mother of such strong will and integrity. I went to work in a draper’s shop and my mother managed so that I could put three shillings aside a week. That taught me self-denial. Now I’m able to keep my mother is such comfort as her age requires, and I thank her every day for that early training. So Miss Hale, I don’t think that I was especially blessed with good fortune or luck.

Mr Thorton: she did save me. But, Mother, I daren’t believe such a woman could care for me.
Hannah Thornton: don’t be so foolish. What more proof do you need, that she should act in such a shameless way?. I’m sure she will take you from me. That is why I didn’t want you to go to see her today. I wanted one last evening of being the first in your affections. I will have to change the initials on our linen. They will bear her name now, hers and yours.
Mr Thorton: I know she doesn’t care for me. But I can’t remain silent. I must ask her.
Hannah Thornton: don’t be afraid, john. She has admitted it to the world. I may yet even learn to like her for it. It must have taken a great deal to overcome her pride.

Mr Thorton: I hadn’t noticed the color of this fruit. Miss Hale I’m afraid I was very ungrateful yesterday.
Margaret: you have nothing to be grateful for.
Mr Thorton: I think that I do.
Margaret: I did only the least that anyone would have.
Mr Thorton: that can’t be true.
Margaret: I was, after all, responsible for placing you in danger. I would have done the same for any man there.
Mr Thorton: any man? So you approve of that violence? You think I got what I deserved?
Margaret: No, of course not! But they were desperate. I know if you were to talk to them ..
Mr Thorton: I forgot you imagine them to be your friends.
Margaret: but if you were to be reasonable ..
Mr Thorton: me? Are you saying that I’m unreasonable?
Margaret: if you would talk with them and not set the soldiers on them, I know they would ..
Mr Thorton: they will get what they deserve. Miss Hale, I didn’t just come here to thank you. I came because .. I think it very likely … I know I’ve never found myself in this position before. It’s difficult to find the words. Miss Hale my feelings for you are very strong.
Margaret: Please, stop. Please don’t go any further.
Mr Thorton: Excuse me?
Margaret: please don’t continue in that way. It’s not the way of a gentleman.
Mr Thorton: I’m well aware that in your eyes at least I’m not a gentleman. But I think I deserve to know why I am offensive.
Margaret: you speak to me as if it were your duty to rescue my reputation!
Mr Thorton: I spoke to you about my feelings because I love you. I have no thought for your reputation.
Margaret: you think that because you are rich and my father is in reduced circumstances that you can have me for your possession? I should expect no less from someone in trade!
Mr Thorton: I don’t want to possess you I wish to marry you because I love you!
Margaret: you shouldn’t because I don’t like you and never have
Mr Thorton: one minute we talk of the color of fruit .. the next of love. How does that happen?
Margaret: I’m sorry
Mr Thorton: for what? That you find my feelings to you offensive? Or that you assume I’m only capable of thinking in terms of buying and selling? Or I take pleasure in sending my employees to an early grave?
Margaret: No! No. of course not. I’m sorry to be so blunt. I have not learnt how to refuse. How to respond when a man speaks to me as you just have.
Mr Thorton: there are others? This happens to you everyday? You must have to disappoint so many men that offer you their heart.
Margaret: please understand, Mr Thornton
Mr Thornton: I do understand. I understand you completely

Margaret: Father is waiting you in the setting room. Mr Thornton I have to thank you
Mr Thornton: No, no thanx. I didn’t do anything for you. Do you not realize the risk that you take in being so indiscreet? Have you no explanation for your behavior that night at the station?. You must imagine what I must think.
Margaret: Mr: Thornton, Please, I’m aware of what you must think of me. I know how it must have appeared, being with a stranger so late at night. The man you saw me with, he .. the secret is another person’s and I cant explain it without doing him harm.
Mr Thornton: I have no wish to spry into the gentleman’s secrets. I’m only concerned as your father’s friend. I hope you realize that any foolish passion for you on my part is entirely over. I’m looking to the future.

Quotes from Pride and Prejudice:
Mr Darcy: forgive me. I hope you are feeling better.
Elizabeth Bennet: I am thank you. Will you not sit down?
Mr Darcy: in vain I have struggled. It will not do! My feelings will not be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you. In declaring myself thus I’m aware that I will be going expressly against the wishes of my family, my friends, and, I hardly need add, my own better judgment. The relative situation of our families makes any alliance between us a reprehensible connection. As a rational man I can’t but regard it as such myself, but it cant be helped. Almost from the earliest moments of your acquaintance, I have come to feel for you a passionate admiration and regard, which despite my struggles, has overcome every rational objection. And I beg you, most fervently, to relieve my suffering and consent to be my wife.
Elizabeth Bennet: in such cases as these, I believe the established mode is to express as sense of obligation. But I can’t. I have never desired your good opinion, and you have certainly bestowed it most unwillingly. I’m sorry to cause pain to anyone, but it was unconsciously done, and I hope will be of short duration.
Mr Darcy: and is that all the reply I am to expect? I might wonder why, with so little effort of civility I am rejected.
Elizabeth Bennet:I might wonder why, with so evident a desire to offend and insult me, you chose to tell me that you like me against your will, your reason, and even against your character! Was this not some excuse for incivility if I was uncivil? I have every reason in the world to think ill of you. Do you think any consideration could tempt me to accept the man who has ruined the happiness of a most beloved sister? Can you deny that you have done it?
Mr Darcy: I have no wish to deny it. I did everything in my power to separate my friend from your sister and I rejoice in my success. Towards him I have been kinder than towards myself
Elizabeth Bennet: it’s not merely that on which my dislike of you is founded. Long before, my dislike was decided when I heard Mr Wickham’s story of your dealings with him. How can yo defend yourself on that subject?
Mr Darcy: you are taking eager interest in that gentleman’s concerns!
Elizabeth Bennet: who that knows of his misfortunes can help feeling an interest in him?
Mr Darcy: his misfortunes! Yes, his misfortunes have been great indeed!
Elizabeth Bennet: and of your infliction! You have reduced him to his present state of poverty, and yet you can treat is misfortunes with contempt and redicule!
Mr Darcy: and this is your opinion of me? My faults by this calculation are heavy indeed. Perhaps these offences might have been overlooked, had not your pride been hurt by the confession of the scruples which long prevented my forming any serious design on you. Had canceled my struggles and flattered you. But disguise of every sort is my abhorrence. Nor am I ashamed of the feelings I related they were natural and just did you expect me to rejoice in the inferiority of your connections? To congratulate myself on the hope of relations whose condition in life is so below my own?
Elizabeth Bennet: you are mistaken Mr: Darcy the mode of your decoration merely spared me any concern for refusing you, had you been more gentleman-like manner. You couldn’t make me the offer of your hand in any possible way that would tempt me to accept it. From the very beginning your manners convinced me of your arrogance, your conceit, and your selfish disdain for the feelings of others. Within a month, I felt you were the last man whom I could ever marry!
Mr Darcy: you’ve said quite enough, madam. I perfectly comprehend your feelings and now have only to be ashamed of what my own have been. Please forgive me for having taken up your time and accept my best wishes for your health and happiness.

Saturday, March 18, 2006

The Prophet Mohamed (PBUH) and the relation with the UV and infra-red rays

I have received this by mail, it’s in Arabic & I will share it on the same shape I received it

علاقة الرسول بالأشعة الحمراء والفوق بنفسجية
أما بعد فهذا الموضوع الغريب التالي ابحث فيه منذأربع سنوات " طبيب عربي " حتى أثبته فأنا طبيب عيون وقد تعمقت كثيرا في حديث الرسول الكريم صلى الله عليه وسلم الذي يقول فيه: إذا سمعتم أصوات الديكه فسلوا الله من فضله فإنها رأت ملكا وإذا سمعتم نهيق الحمي فتعوذوا بالله من الشيطان فإنها رأت شيطاناومن هذا الحديث يتضح لنا ...أن قدره الجهاز البصري للإنسان محدودة ...وتختلف عن القدرة البصرية للحمير ...والتي بدورها تختلف في قدرتها عن القدرة البصرية للديكه ...وبالتالي فإن قدره البصر لدى الإنسان محدوده لا ترى ما تحت الاشعه الحمراء ولا ما فوق الاشعه البنفسجية ...لكن قدره الديكه والحمير تتعدى ذلك ...والسؤال هنا ...كيف يرى الحمار والديك الجن والملائكة ؟???الجواب هو ...أن الحمير ترى الأشعة الحمراء والشيطان وهو من الجان خلق من نار أي من الاشعه تحت لحمراء ... لذلك ترى الحمير الجن ولا ترى الملائكة ...أما الديكة فترى الأشعة البنفسجية والملائكة مخلوقة من نور أي من الأشعة البنفسجية ...لذلك تراها الديكة ..وهذا يفسر لنا لماذا تهرب الشياطين عند ذكر الله ... والسبب هو لأن الملائكة تحضر إلى المكان الذي يذكرفيه الله فتهرب الشياطين....وهذا يذكرنا بالمثل الذي يقول... إذا حضرت الملائكة ذهبت الشياطين... والسؤال ....لماذا تهرب الشياطين عند وجودالملائكة ؟?? الجواب لأن الشياطين تتضرر من رؤية نور الملائكة ...بمعنى أخر ...إذا اجتمعت الأشعة الفوق بنفسجية والأشعة الحمراء في مكانفإن الأشعةالحمراء تتلاشى.. !!!!!
المهم في موضعنا بل الأهم هو ...
عن ابن عباس وعن عائشة أن رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم( كان يرى بالليل في الظلمة كما يرى بالنهار في الضوء )
عن ابن عباس رضي الله عنه قال: قال صلى الله عليه وسلم: ( رأيت الملائكة تغسل حمزة بن عبد المطلب وحنظله ابن الراهب )
عن انس رضي الله عنه قال: قال صلى الله عليه وسلم: ( رصوا صفوفكم وقاربوا بينها وحاذوا بالأعناق فوالذى نفسي بيده إني لأرى الشياطين تدخل من خلل الصفوف كأنها الحذف) والحذف هي الأغنام السوداء الصغيرة ...
هذه الأحاديث الثلاثة تبين لنا أن رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم كان يتمتع بميزة وهي ...في الحديث الأول / أنه كان يرى بالليل كرؤيته بالنهار ...وهذا ما توصل إليه العلم بعد 1420 عام !!!!! وذلك عن طريق المناظير الليلية التي ترى بالليل ...ورغم ذلك فإن الرسول يتفوق بصريا على هذه المناظير ...لأنه كان يرىبالليل بكل وضوح كرؤيتنا نحن بالنهار ...أما المناظير الليلية المصنوعة الآنفإنها لا ترى بالليل بشكل واضح ...فأكثر هذه المناظير تكون فيها الرؤيا ذات لون واحد ...أخضر أو أحمر مثلا ....أما في الحديث الثاني / وهو رؤيته للملائكة ...فهذا يثبت أن الرسول صلى الله عليه وسلم كان يرى الأشعة الفوق بنفسجية ...وإلى الآن وبعد 1420 عام لم يتمكن العلم من اختراع جهاز يرى الأشعة الفوق بنفسجية ...وإلا لكانوا رأوا الملائكة ...
أما الحديث الثالث/ فأعتقدأنه قد أتضح لكم ولا يحتاج لشرح ...
قال تعالى (فكشفنا عنك غطائك فبصرك اليوم حديد ) الايه
قال تعالى في وصف حور العين ( وعند هم قاصرات الطرف عين) الايهحابسات الأعين عن أزواجهن فقصرت أبصارهن على أزواجهن لا يمددن طرفا إلى غيرهم والعين- النجل العيون ...
توضيح علمي ..
عندما اجتمعت كلمتا قاصرات وعين في ايه واحده ...تبادر إلى ذهني موضوع قصر النظر ...وهى الحالةالتي لا يرى المصاب بها إلا عن قرب... وكبر حجم العدسة هو احد الأسباب الهامة لقصر النظر ... الذي في نفس الوقت يضفى لصاحبته حسنا وبهاء ... وقصير النظرلا يستطيع رؤية الأشياء البعيدة بوضوح بدرجه تتفاوت بتفاوت شدته ....الإسراءوالمعراج بالروح والجسد و البصر الخارق( بصر حديد) ..قال تعالى لنبيه الكريم ( فكشفنا عنك غطائك فبصرك اليوم حديد ) ..كل إنسان يوجد على بصره غطاء يمنعه من رؤية أشياء كثيرة ..وبعد الموت يصبح بصر الإنسان قويا بعد أن يزاح هذا الغطاءعن العين ..عندها سيرى كل شيء الجن والملائكة وغير ذلك ..
والرسول صلى الله عليه وسلم كان لديه بصر حديد وكما ورد في الآيةفإن الله أزاح عنه هذاالغطاء ليرى كل شيء { فبصرك اليوم حديد } ..فكان يرى الملائكة ...وكان يستطيع رؤية المصلين من وراءه ...( أقيموا الركوع والسجود فوالله أنى لأراكم منبعد ظهري إذا ركعتم وإذا سجدتم) رواه البخاري ومسلموكان يرى بالليل بوضوح كمايرى بالنهار في الضوء ...وكأن بصر الرسول صلى الله عليه وسلم هو نفسه بصر أي شخص منا بعد الممات أي بصر حديد قوى ونافذ ...وهو ليس بصر الجسد الحي الضعيف ... قال الرسول صلى الله عليه وسلم :( إن الروح إذا قبض تبعه البصر) افهم أن الروح مفصولة عن البصر ويتبعها البصر أين ما ذهبت... وكأنه جهازمستقل بذاته ...والبصر هنا هو البصر الخارق (حديد) مكشوف عنه الغطاء ...لااعتقد أن عين الميت هما الناظرتان للروح فتتبعانها ...لانهما أصبحتا غيرمبصرتين لكي تتبعان الروح .. و لأنه قد ماتت الخلايا العصبية التي تستقبل الصورة وترسلها إلى المخ
البصر العادي لدى الإنسان لا يرى الملائكة والجن ( وهو نفس البصر الحديد لكن مغطى عليه بالغطاء) ...وعندما يزاح هذا الغطاء عند الموت سيرى الميت كل شيء ...حتى أنه يرى روح وهي تطلع... وأحيانا يزاح هذاالغطاء قبل أموت بدقائق أو ساعات ...لذلك نسمع من البعض اللذين هم على فراش الموت أنهم يرون الملائكةأو أنهم يرون الجنة إن كانوا صالحين ..!!!!!
قال تعالى : (ما زاغ البصر وما طغى) الايهوالمقصود هنا بالبصر هو البصرالخارق ... الذي استطاع به الرسول صلى الله عليه وسلم رؤية الملائكة وعجائبالأمور في( الإسراء والمعراج) ...إذا الإنسان يحتوى على جسد وروح وبصر مغطى عليه ...وعندما يموت يتبقى لديه روح وبصر حديد يتبع الروح ...والرسول صلى الله عليه وسلم بشر ...يملك جسد وروح وبصر لكن غير مغطى عليه ( بصره حديد فيالدنيا ) ..
والرسول صلى عليه وسلمإن كان أسري به بالروح فقط كما يقول البعض ...فمعنى هذا انه لم يرى شيء ...لان الروح لا ترى... و هذا إثبات انه صلى الله عليه وسلم لم يسرى به بالروح فقط ...ولكن اسرى به بالروح والجسد والبصر المكشوف عنه الغطاء (بصر حديد) استطاع به أن يرى الملائكة ...واستمرت قوه أبصاره كذلك وهو في الأرض ... وكان كذلك قبلها ...المعروف أن البصرالعادي الذي نرى من خلاله ...هو الذي يتكون من العينين* وعصبين بصريين* وامتدادات إلى خلف المخوهناك بصر يتبع الروح مفصول عنها وهو البصر الحديد ...( لا ندرى مما يتكون لأنه إلى الآن غير مرئي )... وعند الموت وأحيانا قبله ينتهي عمل البصر العادي الذي نرى من خلالهينتهي تماما ...وعند موت البصر العادي ينشط البصر الحديد المكشوف عنه الغطاءوأول ما يقوم به هذا البصرالحديد هو تتبع الروح ...قال تعالى: ( فكشفنا عنك غطائك فبصرك اليوم حديد ) الايهلاحظوا أن البصر الحديد ينشط بعد موت صاحبة ...أي أن البصر الحديد موجود لدى كل شخص منا منذ أن يولد... لكنه يعتبر نائم ولا يستيقظ إلى عند خروجالروح إلى بارئها ...والسؤال هنا ...هل يستيقظ البصر الحديد ونحن أحياء ؟؟؟الجواب :أن البصر الحديد يستيقظ "ينشط" ألاف المرات خلال حياتنا ...بل كلنا قد رأينا من خلال هذا البصر تقريبا كل ليلة ... رأينا الكثير من الأشياء من خلال هذا البصر ...وكلما زاد صلاح المرء وورعه وزهده في الدنيا ...زادت في المقابل قوة إبصاره من خلال البصر الحديد ...وعليه نستطيع أن نقول أن أقوى بصر حديد لإنسان بعد الأنبياء هو أبو بكر الصديق رضي الله عنه ...فهل عرفتم متى يستيقظ "ينشط" هذا البصر الحديد ؟إنه يستيقظ عندما ننام !!!أنا لا أتحدث هنا عن الأحلام بل عما نراه ونحن نحلم ...ولأبسط المسألة ...أقول ...إن كنت رأيت في أحلامك الرسول صلى الله عليه وسلم أو أحد الأنبياء عليهم الصلاة والسلام او الصحابة ...أو رأيت ملائكة ...أو شياطين ... أو رأيت الجنة أو النار أو يوم القيامة ... أو رأيت شخص تعرفه .. توفي منذ زمن .. أو أو أو أو ...فعندها تكون قد استخدمت بصرك الحديد ...
لا حظوا قول ذلك الصحابي للرسول أنه في منامه رأى أن رأسه يتدحرج أمامه وهو ينظر إليه ...لوركزنا فيما سبق سنجد أن البصر العادي يستيقظ "ينشط" عندما نكون أحياء ويموت "ينتهي" عندما نموت ..!! أما البصر الحديد ينام عندما نكون مستيقظين ويستيقظ عندما ننام ...كما أنه يستيقظ اليقظة الأخيرة منذ تطلع الروح أو قبلها بفترة بسيطةوهي اليقظة التي لا يغفو بعدها أبدا ... اللهم اجعل أبصارنا تنعم برؤيتك وجهك الكريم ... ( آمين )
قال تعالى: ( وما كان لبشر أن يكلمه الله إلا وحي أومن وراء حجاب ) أي إن الله سبحانه وتعالى لم يكلم أحد من الأنبياء إذا استثنينا موسى عليه السلام ...إلا بطريقتين :أما عن طريق جبريل عليه السلام ...أو من وراء حجاب ...فما هو هذا الحجاب ؟؟إنه البصر الحديد الذي ينشط عند النوم ...ومن هنا نعلم سبب قول الرسول أن رؤيا الأنبياء حق ...فبصرهم الحديد الذي زادت حدته جدا باعتبارهم أنبياء وصفوة الخلق ..حتىرأوا الله سبحانه وتعالى - حتى إن لم يروه جهارا- فيكفي أنهم رأوه وكلمهم لنعلم مدىقوة بصرهم الحديد ... وهذا يعيدنا للقاعدة المذكورة في الأعلى وهي ...أنه كلما زاد صلاح المرء وورعه وزهده في الدنيا ...زادت في المقابل قوة إبصاره من خلال البصر الحديد ...
نعود للمعجزة التي كانت في بصر الرسول صلى الله عليه وسلم ... فالرسول صلى الله عليه وسلم لم يكن يرى ببصر مثل أبصارنا ...بل إنه حتى قبل النبوة كان يرى ببصره الحديد ...والدليل هو رؤيته لجبريل عليهماالسلام أول مرة في غار حراء ...
والأمر الذي لا أعتقد أن البشر مهما وصولوا في العلم قادرون على تفسيره...هو قوله صلى الله عليه وسلم :( أقيمواصفوفكم وتراصوا فأني أراكم من وراء ظهري ) وفى حديث آخر :( أنى لأراكم من وراءى كما أراكم ) فمن يستطيع تفسير هذا الأمر ؟؟
أقرب تفسير لهذاالأمر هو ...أن بصر الرسول الحديد كان يقع في قلبه ...والدليل قول أنس أن الرسول كانت تنام عيناه ولا ينام قلبه ... وربما تكون هذه ميزه للرسول وإكراماله من رب العالمين ...بأن يجعل نبيه يقظا متنبها في نومه وفي استيقاظه ...
اللهم صلى وسلم على نبينا محمد واله أجمعين .. ..وأخر دعوانا أن الحمد لله رب العالمين

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

Monday, March 13, 2006

Mr.Amr Khaled and the Copenhagen Conference

I admire his speeches, analysis and his desire to make difference for a better future.
The initiative which has been done by
Mr. Amr Khaled The Islamic Preacher and Copenhagen Conference regarding the Danish Cartoons is remarkable; there is a lack of understanding of the Islamic Civilization in the West which resulted in cultural vagueness, it’s been the target of Islamic Preachers, Scholars and motivators “Du’at Islam” to invite Muslims to Islam forgetting those whom had never heard about the beauty of Islam, it’s the time to take the initiative instead of reacting.
It still two days before we will know the results of this Conference and I’m looking forward to seeing the controversy which has taken place between the 25 Muslims whom reflected the image of Muslims & the 25 Danes whom represented the Danish youths

My eyes are upon you, may allah bless all your steps.

Thursday, March 09, 2006

Sense of Aliveness


If this is not a place where tears are understood,
Where do I go to cry?
If this is not a place where my spirits can take wing,
Where do I go to fly?
If this is not a place where my questions can be asked,
Where do I go to seek?
If this is not a place where my feelings can be heard,
Where do I go to speak?
If this is not a place where you ‘ll accept me as I am,
Where can I go to be?
If this is not a place where I can try to learn and grow.
Where can I be just me?
~ William J Crocker ~


Long time ago, something happened to my upbeat mood which blew my sense of well-being away, and vaporized my positive energies.
It’s a time of major struggles & great potential
A time for breaking through patterns of behavior that no longer add value & keep me stuck in the ways of the past, taking me into increasingly soulless existence
A feeling of isolation & burnout …
Cease to fulfill and sustain me.
Caught in this negative spiral … a feeling of powerless, inability to make decision, to act, to think or communicate.
I need a new realization for my full potential as a human being.

“If there were dreams to sell,
what would you buy?
Some cost a passing bell;
Some a light sigh,
That shakes from life’s fresh crown
Only a roseleaf down.”
~ T.L.Beddoes ~

If there were dreams to sell what would i buy? What would I love to have?, all kinds of fabulousness, luxuriousness, happiness?
What is the most valued thing in my life, my real valuables that brings meaning and purpose to my life, my material of goods which will allow me to experience that sense of aliveness, enthusiasm, direction, purpose, contentment, inspiration, satisfaction & fulfillment?

Loving relationship,
Successful career,
Others …

Maybe … inventing answers to questions like these is the best relaxation after a hectic week

“Hope springs eternal in the human breast …”
~ Alexander Pope ~

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Friday, March 03, 2006


Lately I became interested to know what is the meaning of the name Tota in other languages, specifically because a blogger once told me that in their language, Tota stands for "parrot", which I didn't find that interesting.
Today I looked up the word “
Tota” in the Wikipedia, and here is what I got:

Tota, Bishop of Selsey, was present at a council attended by papal legates in 786.
So, that’s it? looks like the name of an ancient bishop not feminine, anyway I’m sure that it has other meanings.

Saturday, February 25, 2006

Being Myself

The vision of who I’m doesn’t fit with the vision of who I want to be, I’m no longer being myself
Is it the time to find the new me?

I shall be myself again,

I shall be myself again …

Tuesday, February 21, 2006

The Borderline ...

You just suddenly call me out of nowhere like that suddenly and not even bothering to care about me in the process!
i understand that we have family ties but, not coz u r a relative of mine that means I already know you very well & we are supposed to talk now, we hardly talk, actually we’ve never talked, you didn’t bother to keep in touch when I tried that many times. why u consider now that you are having a cousin, u can just let it and omit me from your file, coz that what u’ve done long time ago!
It’s not against you … but this is the way i'm feeling it now!

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Tuesday, February 14, 2006

The Valentine’s memory

She went there again …
it’s the same day, same time, same place. but with different circumstances, she was dressing in black and he wasn’t there!recalling all this without him, a reversible process reminded her of the movie ' Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind ' everything is the same, but the second person is omitted, not there ... erased, disappeared from the scene!
then she thought …maybe a kind of miracle would happen and he will show up in the perfect moment... she started to believe that between a second or another she may see him coming towards her, taking her hands & telling her that he was wrong when he decided to leave her. he discovered that his life never values without her coz she completes him!
and that he learned to
”Never let a problem to be solved become more important than a person to be loved.” ~ Barbara Johnson ~”True love does not come by finding the perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly.” ~ Jason Jordan ~ he couldn’t withstand that feeling of being hopeless, that the love of his life may go with the wrong man, so he wants her back, stammering that he still loves her!
but then, even nature itself played against her & refused to help her contemplate the moment any further … It rained heavily in a way as if it insists to wash away every single memory of him.… she remembers when she first met him in the winter of 2005. lt was a marvelously sunny day, very different weather than today, as if the sun only shined for them to lighten their day and overwhelm them by its warmth. “To love and be loved is to feel the sun from both sides. ” ~ David Viscott ~
The bad weather obliged her to hurry back home, in her way back she discovered that she lost her most precious ring!, is it a sign of something, that what we lost we can never get it back?!
“If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it was, and always will be yours. If it never returns, it was never yours to begin with.” ~ Unknown ~

She doesn’t hate him even though he caused her so much pain. She believes that this is exactly what happened with her.
”Love the heart that hurts you, but never hurt the heart that loves you.” ~ Vipin Sharma ~
She wanted to end it in the same place where it all started, to end this painful story. Wishing for a divine accident, a different scene, a different end!

Cast ur eyes on the ocean… Cast ur soul to the sea…When the dark night seems endless… please remember me ... (Loreena McKennitt, Dante's Prayer)

Does he worth all that?, Nothing makes any sense to me!
“I hold it true, whate’er befall;
I feel it, when I sorrow most;
‘Tis better to have loved and lost
Than never to have loved at all.”
~ Alfred, Lord Tennyson ~

Sunday, February 12, 2006

Below the Tip of the Iceberg!

Do you know how it feels when you start your day with this feeling that you are in your bed under your heavy covers, feeling all warm and cozy, and when you start to open your eyes to begin a new day, suddenly you sense a migraine in the left side of your head?! This is not a good sign, and it means that you will continue the rest of your day with this pain in your head.

Four days ago, I had another type of pain in my head. I lost my sense of direction for a moment and without any prior warning while sitting in my chair or couch, or while lying in my bed. I feel like I’m losing control... a feeling of being unbalanced. I can't determine my direction, whether it’s left or right or where I am sitting... is it the living room, or my own room? It happens just for a second, and then everything goes back to normal again. It's a strange feeling and it lasted for two Consecutive days, but everything seemed okay for me on Friday and I’m no longer feeling this way now.

Yesterday however I woke up with a migraine and the worst thing about this headache is that you are supposed to take pills to heal it. I can’t swallow them and this is another problem. Well this has always been my problem with medicines like this: I need to drink a liter of water to be able to swallow them, otherwise they stick in my throat refusing to go down directly to my stomach!!. I think this is one of the reasons that makes me hate to take medicine.

today I feel much better a little pain but not that strong, hope to wake up tomorrow ISA, with nothing new continuing to give me headaches!!

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Wednesday, February 08, 2006

A Spirit Slogan ...


It began with a deep perception of the way my life moves forward, noticing those chance events that occur at just the right moment, to suddenly send my life in a new and important direction. Where I started to intuit higher meaning in these mysterious happenings, which I couldn’t understand them, but i knew they were real and with it I started to look for more fulfillments in my life, that won’t put up with anything that seems to bring me down.
I’m sensing again, that there is another side of life that i have yet to discover, some other process operating behind the scenes, a quantum leap, transformation began with unconscious Insight then as a profound sense of restlessness. But afterwards with some glimpses on the alternative kind of experience ... moments in my life felt different somehow, more intense and inspiring.

I thought it’s a new awareness of the spiritual which is expanding, a kind of positive psychological contagion, that crystallized something i perceive in life and suspended my doubts and distractions... to believe that this reality can be my own, my life had been guided by some unexplained force, a feeling of mystery and excitement and, as a result, i felt more alive.

But I didn’t know what this experience is or how to make it last, and when it ended I’m left feeling dissatisfied and restless with a life that seems ordinary again.

How, when, where, it happened? And why I returned back to that same first point?, I was feeling all these changes step by step, I was developing day after day, then suddenly all this started to decay, as if I’m inside a ship & moving away from the land I discovered, this land is disappearing slowly as that force moves my ship away, I need a strong sort of gravity to pull me back to my Island before it’s too late.
what was the secret behind that gravity which pulled me towards this feeling, and when it’s gone the feeling gone?!

Was it a person? Charged me with all kinds of the positive feelings, inspired me till the bone & when that person gone the feeling gone, or maybe a place, a situation, or a certain kind of pain?
why I’m returning back to that old person?, why I’m losing all these nice feelings?. I don’t know how I was creating them & I don’t have a clue to create them again, every time I try, I end up with empty faded visions!

Inspired by “The Celestine Prophecy”
I consider this post one of the most important posts I wrote along my blogging period, coz it is crystallizing turning points and meanings I passed through them in the last year till this moment!
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Tuesday, February 07, 2006

Raise Your Voice

The Idea; is for every passer by who come here by chance, you may drop me a line in here, you who would make it work out!

Wednesday, February 01, 2006

Something Stupid

I know I stand in line
Until you think you have the time
To spend an evening with me
And if we go someplace to dance
I know that there's a chance
You won't be leaving with me
Then afterwards we drop into a quiet little place
And have a drink or two
And then I go and spoil it all
By saying something stupid
Like I love you
I can see it in your eyes
That you despise the same old lines
You heard the night before
And though it's just a line to you
For me it's true
And never seemed so right before
I practice every day to find some clever lines to say
To make the meaning come true

But then I think I'll wait until the evening
gets late
And I'm alone with you
The time is right
Your perfume fills my head
The stars get red
And oh the night's so blue
And then I go and spoil it all
By saying something stupid
Like I love youI love you...

There is a moment about this song that makes it worth while, but it only once!
when you suddenly realize that someone 've really screwed something up and there's absolutely nothing that person can do about it. No amount of regret or sorry will change the fact that it was entirely a fault.

Tuesday, January 31, 2006


People can be amazingly nice for the reason that they are just naturally that way. I got to know 30 new person lately, and they were approaching me one by one to get to know who Iam. I think I will enjoy my time with them as the days go by.

Days proved that they are entirely amazing, generous and kind … but this nice experience ‘s over since Sat. Feb, 4th I’m happy that I had the opportunity to know them & spend some days with them!

Sunday, January 29, 2006

Predominantly … Exclusively!

No; as I thought that I will start to relax, I asked myself is this the suitable time to have a break and relax, maybe I just need to deal constructively with the disorder that surrounds me, an insightful approach in to the way i might want to live my life.

I still have a list to do yet:
- 3 books I’m dying to read, I was reading some pages during my examination period (this is already one of my tools for relaxation but sometimes it seems as a duty specially that two of them are not hard copy, they are e-books)
- preparing for some courses
- 8 reports to be delivered by 1st of February
- others to read & prepare for my supervisor …
these things no matter how much I feel they are trivia specially the reports section but they r having a higher priority now.
Organizing all this in my head, this may keep me busy till the middle of the next month where I will start my second semester, that’s good, coz I’m that type of persons who cant stay in this life this way & do nothing.
Then I received a phone call from a company asking me to come for a job interview today, I remember that company, I already made an interview with them the last year exactly Nov. 2004, and they had sent me an e-mail asking me to work for them per task, and in case I’ve agreed I have to contact them, at that time I just ignored the mail, I didn’t feel that I do like the company!!!
So, nothing has changed except that I feel I’m now less qualified for this position than when I was last year, the interview was at 12 pm I asked her to postpone it to the following day but she said that this is impossible, it could be any time late but not the following day, ok so I made it at 1:30 pm.

Maybe this is a good chance for me I didn’t expect it and it came in the very exact suitable timing, but I still have that feeling of not being that much happy with it, Do we accept things because at that time we don’t have any other choices? I only have this choice and I have to fight to get it no matter how much I hate it. Two days ago I was thinking about that same subject: what if every time I have no other choice, and it’s always only that one single choice to take it or end up a loser, when is it the time for us to make our own choices by ourselves, and when should we let life lead our way & choose the path for us?
I admit too that life choices have always been the best choices for me

I have to review some things at least to find something to say in that interview and read my CV again, but I don’t feel I want to do it, what am I going to do in this interview then?, I cant figure this out!!