Sunday, May 14, 2006

Reflection of Intermittent Thoughts

Stetting alone and retreating unsociably inside myself, generating words gathered in lines, use my hand to produce dots on my screen … maybe aiming to send a message in code for someone who is in fact somewhere else, someone I know nothing about and might never meet. While my message is traveling for days maybe weeks through time and space … sometimes it’s understood other times not, I don’t know who may read it … it feels like a one-way process missing all kinds of basic communication… there is a potential of failure in putting across what I want to say and how I feel; so if I was writing for people indeed I’d relinquish writing long time ago, but in fact I do write out to myself matching my style, my mood & my needs, although It’s not a typical diary whereas you can’t find a very detailed personal post here, I don’t know, it’s against my nature, but maybe one day I would set and write something very detailed here, till then you shouldn’t expect it, occasionally next Friday 19th of May it will be a whole year of blogging, a complete year!.
along this one year journey I met many bloggers I prefer the term “Next Door Bloggers”, coz I feel it as houses and doors … and behind each door i would find stories and thoughts, i enter it with one knock on my “Go” button or URL linked to my page, at every door step I feel different impression, a certain thought related to that owner of this place, and a special spot I prefer there, a certain post or conversation!.

I’m not sure whether it was a total waste of my time on meaninglessness … spending hours on such page, I’m not sure if it really worth my time … let me say it’s mercurial and let it go at that!.

9 comments:

Wonderer said...

such a lovely post ya tota,
I loved the metaphore of the next door bloggers.
However, I feel that there is something bothering you, I hope I am wrong.
Happy blogging year

Mollysbrother said...

I just happened by. And I thought that I would leave a comment.

Such an insightful post. Powerful. Thought-provoking.

LouLou said...

Kol 3am winti bikhair ya Tota:)

Safiya Outlines said...

Blogging can suck up a lot of your time, but also I agree that it is one of the best ways to get a viewpoint of other people's lives.

Alina said...

"but in fact I do write out to myself matching my style, my mood & my needs" Beautifully put! Indeed you have a very special style to post, to comment, to relate! Happy bloggyversary Tota! Many other posts to come!

Rain said...

It's amazing how time flies by ... dunno what ppl say in such occasions..happy blogging year?? :)) , it's a new trend!

sometimes when u revise ur archives , u think to urself "who wrote this" :) .
It's a kindda documentary activity , like taking pictures and saving them in ur life album.

tota said...

Thank you .. wonderer, Loulou, Alina, Rain ...

Joey
You are welcomed

Safyia … that’s true … but although it connects u with ppl & their minds from one side, it disconnects u from practical vivid life from the other side. I feel it like two different extremes; although both of them are supposed to be a sociably related process to an extent.

Anonymous said...

I agree with Wonderer that something is bothering Tota. May be she wish she never generate these lines or send her messages in the air but for me writing is a kind of freedom I wanted to taste in every way that could reach my hand. Freedom that I begin to feel its reasonability now and which tie me up more now than set me free.

tota said...

Can we live without a bothered mind, would life become a real one without tasting this ‎flavor, then switch again to our normal state, so feel more alive?‎

Why u don’t feel that freedom now, coz it’s not private & secure?‎

Welcome back btw Rami :)‎