It’s a story of my friend, she is a dear friend to me, she used to tell me the most about her, I was her mirror, advice her & direct her, we didnt talk for a while, she was busy as i was too.
but now I dunno what to tell her, coz I don’t want to break her heart
It all began the last year, she doesn’t remember exactly when, but it’s sure in days like these. The late of November
She was surfing the net, adding her new friends whom she knew through her study in that educational center to her own MSN list, when she added that mail account by mistake
It was just a typo, but it changed many things later
First of all, she found a strange name in her list, telling her Hi .. how r u ?
she replied, and she noticed that she added that account by mistake so she apologized, she didn’t like to go on in that, because she doesn’t like such type of friendships over the net.
But she found him cute, told her it’s ok & if you don’t mind, may we talk?
So she agreed
Day after day they became addicted to talk everyday .. she is living in Egypt & he is working outside in Bahrain
later he told her he is going to move to KSA to work for other big firm
But in his way he will pass by Egypt,
some days later ….
He told her that he feels comfortable by talking with her, he likes her & want to see her, on advance so if they agreed they may engage & he gave her the time to think and promised her that whatever happened he will never hurt her!
She was confused, she was afraid … but then she accepted
She told her mum & she met him that day, it was in the valentine day…. Afterwards she felt he changed, she noticed that … then she found him telling her on a SMS “the most important thing is that u r fine regardless of any other thing and I want you to know that I really care about you whether we will go ahead or stop and I still don’t want to hurt you I’m still confused and still feel there is a big gab that prevent us to understand each others and it’s obvious that it will be hurting if we get more close then stopped I rather to stop it now that hurt you later, I wouldn’t do that if I don’t care! ”
She told me at that time she was shocked, nothing happened for that. where is his words. “I like me when I’m with you” … you r my angel and all that bla bla bla !!!
The night before that day she had a tension conversation with him, he told her I wanna talk with you in an important matter, then he called her & he was stressed & couldn’t talk, they hanged the phone & then … she was very depressed. Then she got that SMS with no excuse
She kept silent. She didn’t do any action towards that although that SMS made her feel worry, she is now afraid of him, that way in one word he can just stop everything … she said it all to her mum ,,, then the rest of her family knew it, her father & brother
So some days later she found him calling her, what is up with you? why you didn’t answer me? I’m killed of being worry about you “” what a psycho? “
She informed him that her family now knows about his subject, she felt that he didn’t like her to tell her family about their subject at the moment?
He told her, why you didn’t inform me before telling them?
She said I just did !!
Then called her later to ask her if he is welcomed to come for their home for a visit ??
She agreed and she was happy for that!She told me that he stayed for 5 hours and a half … what a long visit!
Then after that …. Just talks, MSN, phone … but nothing new !!
Two months later after his visit she became stressed,, what the hell he is doing?
why he talks to her?, what does he wants from her?, why he doesn’t take any steps?,,,, is he that negative personality or he is just afraid?,,, she told me that he told her in one of their conversations,,, “ I don’t want to risk it I want to be 100% sure of taking the step and you don’t help me you are not encouraging me!, i want you to pull me!! ”
she “ and how to help you ? ”
he “ I cant figure till now how my life would be with you later, you don’t show me anything!! ”
(What a brilliant man, is that his point of view of not hurting and selecting his words, what do you expect? To ask you to marry her or what?)
Then she was totally down confused & stressed and she didn’t accept it to her dignity, so she asked him politely in a small letter that “you could take your time to think about it and put your decision to not feel that you are risking any thing, I would do that too and think wisely, but till then we shouldn’t talk to not affect each others decisions!”
So later she found him sending her a letter telling her that he was wishing for a good end ,,, but it’s not applied now & thanks for everything!!
( so? This is the end of it, the end of that little dream that he made her to live in, where are the sweet words, is he such a normal person, just so coward to have a decision in his life & he is playing around and around!)
she was very embarrassed to tell her family how things were over with him!!
What is the reason?? The reason was that she asked him to think!
So she cleaned her list & he told her that he removed her too
That was ended on the first of may ….
To be cont.,
15 comments:
WOOOHA!
thats just utterly disgusting!
sorry but this guy acted like a complete idiot teenager!
cant wait for the rest of the story!
hmmmm teenager! why u called him so?
it may surprise u, he was nearly 29 yesrs old
he was blaming her for everything, as he sees her negative and not acting towards him !!
which part u see him the most idiot in it? !
ya tota your story seems all too familiar. far too familiar to me. trust me, what it reminds me of, is much much worse than this. she consider herself lucky. at least he let her be at the end. lets see another pssible scenario:
he could have played on the fact that she is hooked on him and drag it on for ages! and he could have told her at one point: lets be friends. it is not working out. she could have agreed, because she is too attached to him to push him away. also his caring loving attached attitude would make her think: he is just confused. or scared. and eventually, she just needs him around, for the hope that he would come around.
he could have played this out, and time after time, reminded her of the things that bother him, so she would think it is her fault.
then one day he would call her up (as a friend) and tell her he has found someone, plz wish me hte best!
that is a far worse scenario. and she should thank God it did not happen. maybe the fact that she involved her parents made things more difficult for him to play with her. beleive me , she is lucky.
sorry for the rambling. just that your story struck a nerve, and i really wish that people like that would just cease to be!
Tota,
"teenager! why u called him so?
it may surprise u, he was nearly 29 yesrs old
he was blaming her for everything, as he sees her negative and not acting towards him !!
which part u see him the most idiot in it? ! "
a man can be 50 and act like a teenager.
a teenager as in he's indecisive b 3abat keda, he doesnt know what he wants, whether to let her go or stay wth her.
the part that i really cant understand is when he went to meet her parents, it takes courage to do that, he did it, now he doesnt wanna move forward and wants to stay just friends?! howa faker beyot el nas le3ba wala eh!
He is such that type Doshar ... i cant judge him , maybe he is doing that according to his own believes & he is seeing that he is right
But what I got that he is not such a direct person, his words always have many faces, say something & then says no not that the meaning I intended to say, and accuse her that she cant understand him!
He didn’t let her go by his own will
((he was changing her rules & principles, trying to convince her that he is right & her way of thinking is logically wrong, always makes her feel guilty & makes excuses “weird ones” for his own acts))
he gave up when he found her sticking to her principles and his doings didn’t make him able to divert her from it.
Chari
I know that a man could be 50 & still acting as a teenager, but I was wondering why u analyzed his personality as being a teenager and not anything else
"the part that i really cant understand is when he went to meet her parents, it takes courage to do that, he did it"
Yes it needs courage
And in one of their conversations he told her “ did I say that I’m proposing to u when I visited u?, I still didn’t say it, and I wont do that till I become completely sure of that word & step to take! ”
( How that could hurt, and i wonder as u do Chari why he went for that visit?? )
I don't know what to say ....
The whole thing was wrong from the very beginning ...
I am just wondering how come her parents did not advice her or at least ask her to be careful?!!!
Can't wait too to listen to the rest of the story...my imagination is already creating the rest.
And I'm also surprised about the parent's attitude...and top of all..HIS attitude...I really pitty your friend...
Small things always result in huge things....it's fate after all.
Wonderer,
maybe you are right that it was wrong from the begning
things were going in the right route, as formal relation, her family knows about him & saw t him, he was calling her brother on phone
but we cant know the interiors of ppl
how come that her family didnt advice her .. they were very generous with him, they excused him that he maybe having some condtions and cant till about it, and over all that she was persuaded of him, but everything has a limit.
Welcome Rain to my blog :)
i cant tell all the details of the story it may need a book :)
but in brief, her family wasnt watching, it's just the situation that he was talking with her giving her excuses & she was believing him "coz in a certain moment she trusted him", till she reached her saturation & put an end for all that suffering & going arround.
"she replied, and she noticed that she added that account by mistake so she apologized, she didn’t like to go on in that, because she doesn’t like such type of friendships over the net.
But she found him cute, told her it’s ok & if you don’t mind, may we talk?
So she agreed"
She shouldn't have agreed ...
But then again maybe going through something like this will make her more careful next time... I really feel for her.. she seems to be a kind natured, trusting person...
Chari,
"a teenager as in he's indecisive b 3abat keda, he doesnt know what he wants, whether to let her go or stay wth her."
I agree with you...
Hmmm yes I don't know but he might have met someone else or he was just having a flirt and didn't think of the consequenses, either way he could have been much more mature about it. He probably only wanted to get in bed or he wasn't ready for a relationship, I dunno.
Micke
Hmmm yes I don't know but he might have met someone else or he was just having a flirt and didn't think of the consequenses, either way he could have been much more mature about it. He probably only wanted to get in bed or he wasn't ready for a relationship, I dunno.
Me,
going through something like this will make her more careful next time"
I'm sure that she learned a lot from that situaiton, that made her looking more deep in her life
First, I don't believe in real relationship over wires of chatting. So, it was both (he & she) fault to be drawn in this relation in the first place depending on chatting.
Of course, as in the 1rst meeting, both'll feel it's another person than that on MSN. This is normal. It needs time, real time to know each other and not build their relation on illusions or imagining image that had been built through chatting.
As all had said that the man is teenager, disgusting, psycho and .... I’ve totally different opinion. That man was extra sensitive about hurting her, may be he has been previously hurted badly and didn't want her to feel that at least by his hand. That extra sensitivity made him confused and don’t have courage to make steps forward and even backward without seeing a clear sign from her.
He decides to go than to hurt her coz he feel he really don't know her.
"She is afraid"
It seems that it's her first experience and she had to be braver and control her feelings next time.
Her fear makes her tell her family and I don't see this's the correct time to do so. She can tell her mum, of course, if she's the nearest person to her and will accept her advice. But even so, I would not advice her to tell him that she told her mum. The rest of the family should know, but in the correct time when something serious happen. I wish u understand me. Telling ur family is like pushing him for commitment before they both decide to do this. It's a bad indicator to the man that this girl is pushing him. Remember he doesn’t know her yet and he's trying to do but everything goes in the wrong directions.
"I don’t want to risk it I want to be 100% sure of taking the step and you don’t help me you are not encouraging me!, i want you to pull me!!"
He's extra open and try to express his feelings of uncertainty but everything he do is getting her depressed, hurted and confused. She’s pushing him and he can’t get it. I see he’s totally confused may be more than her.
"This is the end of it, the end of that little dream"
They're mismatching and it's the expected end of story.
ok, iknatoon let's agree with your analysis ... did you read pat two??
why he showed up again? this means he had his time, no stress, no pushing .. he is back with his own well
how can u explain that silence again after her Q?
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